Months before the birth of my baby
After reading many books, watching hours of YouTube videos, attending pre-natal classes, speaking to midwives, family and friends I was left more confused than ever regarding where my baby should rest. There were ample options to consider with many pros and cons. For a first time mum I was always left with more questions than answers when I first started looking around.
I did my research thoroughly and focused on the facts. I came to the conclusion that co-sleeping was definitely not an option. Sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS) is very real. The Red Nose foundation has great information.
According to Red Nose safe sleeping includes:
- Sleeping baby on the back
- Baby must have his own cot in the parents room
- Baby’s head and face must be uncovered, i.e. no hat
- baby’s feet must be at the bottom of the cot with his blankets tucked around him
- Use a safe sleeping bag with armholes and no hood
- Do not use pillows and bulky bedding
After much consideration we decided to go with a sleigh cot that eventually converts into a toddler bed, a portacot and a cute bassinet.
Our hospital stay
My baby stayed with me 24/7 in my room during my 3 night stay at the Royal Womens Hospital. The hospital bassinet was close to my bed however due to the fact I had a cesarean section, the Pepi-Pod was offered to me. This was co-sleeping at its safest with my baby right next to me but sleeping in his own little box. It made caring for my baby easier while I was confined to the hospital bed. To be completely honest I was feeding the baby almost every 2 hours. A feed lasted thirty minutes and he spent more time in my arms and on my chest then in his own bed.
The bassinet
For the first couple of days we tried to settle our baby into the bassinet. It was pushed up right against my bed but I was still recovering from my cesarean and it was terribly difficult to reach over and lift him up. Our baby had very short periods of sleep in the bassinet. During the day he preferred laying on the sofa / bed or we carried him and at night he started off in the bassinet but I found it easier just letting him sleep on mine and my husbands chest. He slept for longer and cried less. We literally only used the bassinet for the first two weeks of my baby’s life.
Co-sleeping
I haven’t been getting much sleep since the day my baby was born. The midwife who did the home visit 3 days after we left the hospital suggested we co-sleep in a safe way. My husband, my baby and I should each have our own blankets, with my husband and I only covering up to our waist. I was shocked that she could suggest such a thing, putting my baby on the same bed as us. That night we tried putting the bassinet basket in the bed to use as a make shift Pepi-Pod however there was no space for my husband and I. Putting him on the bed was still not an option. I refused to do it, it was easier keeping my baby on my chest. As the days went by, he just completely refused to sleep in the bassinet and I was running on little to no sleep at night. A week later we found our selves co-sleeping with my baby in our bed. I was literally hanging off the bed on one side , my husband close to the edge on the other side and baby slept stretched with majority of the space. It was really, really uncomfortable for my husband and I with the both of us not getting enough rest.
Time for the big cot
When my baby was just over a month old my husband eventually bunked on the floor for two nights in a row. That was when we decided enough was enough he had to go into the cot. He fussed and cried and screamed for a few nights, he didn’t like the cot, he wanted to be held and cuddled and snuggled, which every newborn baby loves. We persevered and never gave up, and each night he slept longer than the night before. Now at almost 3 months old, he only wakes up when he is hungry, I feed him and he is back in his cot. Although, I must admit that sometimes when he wakes up at 4am I want him in the bed right next to me, or I cuddle him to sleep on top of me.
I am always vigilant and practice safe sleeping and I will not do anything that will harm my little baby.
The Portacot
The portacot is assembled and kept in the living room to be used during the day, although his sleeps are very short in it, I get some sort of a break. My baby enjoys lying in it when he is awake, looking at, playing and talking to his mobile. It is very rare that he would fall asleep on his own in the portacot, he still prefers going to sleep cuddled close to me in my arms.
Lessons learnt
On several occasions my maternal health and child nurse has said that: “baby should be falling asleep in his own bed”. I can’t leave him in the cot to cry himself to sleep, I’m his mum after all – my job is to attend to his every need. I will sing to him and rock him until he falls asleep.
Many people will disagree with cuddling my baby to sleep or co-sleeping in the same bed. At the end of the day as a mum you got to do whats best, you got to do what works and you got to do what feels right for you and your little one.
No amount of resources can completely prepare you for the reality of putting your baby to sleep. Its trial and error on different methods before you find the right one. Just ensure you practice safe sleeping for your baby to remain safe.
My Pumpkin Pie, The Apple of my Eye, My Little Baby, This is the Journey between you and me. A once in a lifetime opportunity.
Very informative Filay. So many things I never knew of. After all my last born was in 1996.
You are a great mum. Always gaining information on how best to cope with your little one.
All the best